Giving up smokes the Amoir way, pt 1

25 Dec

25/12/06 – Day 1 – Christmas Day.

9:30am – have first smoke of the day, 3 hours later than usual. Delightful headspin ensues.
10:30am – convince self I will smoke the remaining three ciggies in the pack, then detox.
1:30pm – have final smoke while watching Series 2 DVD of Lost.
4:00pm – apartment now empty of bacon supplies
5:00pm – apartment now empty of chocolate icecream supplies
7:15pm – wonder how long salt supplies will last.
7:26:pm – realise it takes 3 days for nicotine to leave your system.
7.27pm – wonder if on the fourth day I could just begin a “few smozzies in the evening” routine.
7:30pm – realise it is now time to hit the emergency stage of “Operation: super happy smoke time go bye bye” and pop a sedative. Whilst watching “Alien versus Predator”, one of the best “men in suit” films ever.
7:45pm – see the lil aliens that look like vaginas and realise that HR Geiger wasn’t a fan of ladyfolk sitting on his face.
8:04pm – begin to wonder what state I’ll be in for attending Boxing Day celebrations. Imagine self breaking through polite chitchat to scrap with someone’s mother-in-law because it seems completely rational to defend the honour of the yum yum balls recipe from those Family Circle recipe cards collection from 1977.
8:08pm – start penning apology email.
8:34pm – mawmawmamawmamawmawmamaw I wanna be sedated
8:37pm – no amount of sedation can make “The Christmas Panel” funny
9:33pm – You know, a smoke would go really well with this cuppa…

One Response to “Giving up smokes the Amoir way, pt 1”

  1. Simpsonslover December 29, 2006 at 6:37 am #

    “8:37pm – no amount of sedation can make “The Christmas Panel” funny” – I just laughed out my granuloma. Huzzah! No need for surgery!

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