Things to love: How to perk up your Sunday the Amoir way

25 Feb

I have a touch of melancholy at the mo’ and feel more burdened than Conor Oberst at Frownapalooza getting dumped by a girl, rejected by his dad, having a bad hair day and having his ironic t-shirt misunderstood by the low-slung set.

There is, naturally, a way to remedy this.

Amoir’s sure-fire 10 point plan to “c’mon, get happy you emofucktard“.

  1. Find $5 in your jacket pocket after a chat with Lakshmi.
  2. Dress in something other than that tattered Jane’s Addiction t-shirt and knickers.
  3. Put on make-up.
  4. Break out the high-heeled boots.
  5. Sashay up Exhibition and nearly take a tumble in front of a young Asian crue. Then, just to cement their suspicion you’re as mad as a hatstand, uncontrollably giggle at your clumsiness.
  6. Sashay a bit more guardedly to Pellegrinis.
  7. Enjoy a delightfully strong cafe latte which is promised as “the best ever”.
  8. Have that chap refuse your money. He always gets softly flirtatious when you’re made up.
  9. Give the fiver to the homeless chap on the corner.
  10. Sashay dreamily through the orange-hued gardens (Autumn’s coming!) and realise things are pretty fucking good so stop complaining and just work through it.

Signs the Universe possibly wants you to quit smoking: you find an intriguing apartment. Well within your desired price range and location. The catch? It’s a non-smoking apartment. *sigh*

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: