Things to tell the younger Amoir

2 Apr

There’s a whole lotta introspection going on in the blogosphere of late. Maggie Mason of Mighty Girl fame has been counting 100 things she’s glad to have done and 100 things she wants to do before she kicks off the earthly espadrille and Lifehacker has asked what advice would you give your younger self.

As a lady who enjoys periodically dipping a nicotine-stained finger into the zeitgeist, I’ve felt compelled to steal some sugar from their bowl.

Top 5 memories I want flashing through the mental trinitron when I expire:
* Watching Interpol perform live and celebrating my freedom
* Riding with the Seagull on the bike through Byron Bay. Wearing high heeled boots and being heckled by friends driving by.
* Running through the Torii at Fusimi Inari Teisha, giggling with enchanted glee
* Seeing my name in print
* Squealing with mania under a storm with the Lad and Mrs Lad who shall not be named dancing and shrieking under the night sky. Oh, and half naked.

Advice Older Amoir would give to the Younger Amoir:
* Please don’t wait until the age of 31 to find a decent set of hair straighteners.
* There are things in life to fear. Things to fear and then persue and embrace. Confined or widespread zombie attack is not one of them.
* Life is too short to waste it watching a David Arquette film.
* Shut up and get on with it
* Calm down: it’s way stranger and funnier than you could ever imagine.

To come: Top 5 things I want to do before hectoring St Peter for a smoke. Currently at #1, placing the Intoxicating Dubliner in a painful figure four lock before extracting from him all the admissions and agreements I choose. And lifetime tea making services.

3 Responses to “Things to tell the younger Amoir”

  1. Being Me April 2, 2008 at 11:49 pm #

    I still think it’s cute how much you love your tea *knuckle rubs Amoir on the head*

  2. Adam April 6, 2008 at 5:21 am #

    what’s a figure four lock? diagrams, if possible.

  3. Amoir April 11, 2008 at 4:35 am #

    Adam, how can you not know of the Figure 4?*sigh* I performed it on the ex once. After that we had a chat about emasculation. Actually, that was also discussed when we discovered I could lift him into the air. What am I? Brigitte Nielson? No, just a woman who jones for Jim Reid lookalikes.

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