The Dublin report

When I think of the most transformative relationships I’ve had, cities play an equal role to people.

It’s a strange concept, possibly, and might make me sound like someone who collects cats and wary glances as a hobby but it’s true: it is completely possible to fall in love with a city and be transformed by that relationship. It’s a bond that is not molded by people but by potential, a frisson of energy that tickles at your ribs and raises your shoulders.

Melbourne: my first love. After the separation in which I saw my marriage and a good amount of friends fall away, I turned to the city. I roamed its streets when alone and explored. It opened me to art and the cool sleek grey grid rewarded me with discovery and delight. I learnt photography in Melbourne and found the streets became a most obliging muse. I could never believe my luck and thrill to find such joy in its streets.

Osaka: my long-sought and surprising reward. I wasn’t supposed to love Osaka. In fact, it was the frumpy stopover before I ran to the more glamourous Kyoto and Tokyo. But the minute I set down, I started to love its earnest and slightly grubby grin. I made friends who took me riding through the city to meet their mates and little old ladies who fed me takoyaki. In terms of lovers, Osaka is the rebound city – you go there to regroup, recalibrate and wash away. In a completely melodramatic statement, it was a reward for childhood, allowing me to delight in all.

Dublin: it was an end to a means, only ever a tourist destination while I explored other options. But while Dublin is tourist spot to many, I’ve found I cannot treat it this way. Instead of visiting galleries, I visit cafes and watch. I walk the streets and watch people, I linger at traffic lights and chat. I don’t take photographs – the city won’t let me be a tourist. What there is in Dublin I cannot explain. I don’t understand the pull I feel when I am here but I know that I don’t want to leave. Not because of specific people (point in fact, I long to move to a place where no one knows me) but there is an unparalleled potential to this city.

Last year I thought I wanted to conquer London, to move there and make it my own. Then I visited and though, not smitten, still wanted to work there once I was retrenched. But it’s impossible to get into or hired by London. Also, London kinda sucks. Sucks like a dejected 40 year old. Sucks like thinned lips over bared teeth. London lacks what these other cities have: beauty paired with softness and potential. Like New York, London is a city that is a few years out of my reach.

However, I want to find a way into the EU so that the Seagull and I can build for the future and have adventures together. It’s been a goal for 1.5 years that I’ve worked towards in my typically bombastic fashion. And Dublin appears to be the entry point – I love the city, the work is here, the creativity is here and there is a reasonable visa entry process. From Dublin, we can explore the region together and spread out wings. I can show her the world and we can meander into the life I dream of us having.

We’ll see how it goes. Dreams can come true but they are in essence flights of fancy.