From the archives: what to serve the creature from the Black Lagoon.

4 Jan

auroraFound an old interview I did with my daughter (6 at the time) that was in Dumbo Feather.

Amy: What are you going to do when you grow up?
Aurora: I’m going to have a band called The Painters. Does that sound like a good name?

Am: Why ‘The Painters’?
Au: I’m gonna have a band with people who are art smart like me.

Am: What are you going to sing about?
Au: Rock songs, pop, funk?

Am: Funk?
Au: Wait, what, not that one. I keep getting mixed up. Rock, all different types of songs. But not funk. Definitely not funk.

Am: My wrist hurts. How would you fix it?
Au: Well, what I would do is, you could rest it a lot. On your leg for a while.

Am: Could I take anything for it?
Au: You could take hayfever tablets.

Am: What do they do?
Au: Well, it helps your ankle if it’s really sore. Your nose if it’s really runny or your eye if it’s really red. And helps you if you’ve got the flu or cough or cold.

Am: What’s your favourite film?
Au: Godzilla.

Am: Why?
Au: It’s a really funny film. Remember that one where Godzilla fights Mecha Godzilla cause…. [trails off]

Am: What was funny?

Am: What would you do if you met the creature?
Au: I would just go [shrugs], “creature, please do not rip me up”.

Am: Would you make friends with him?
Au: Eh, not really because he really, really looks, you know, horrifying. Ghosts are real, you know.

Am: Really?
Au: I’ve seen them before.

Am: Where?
Au: When I was a little girl when I was four. I saw a black ghost in my bedroom.

Am: What did it do?
Au: It kept coming closer and closer and the ghost was going to close the door until I stepped in it and then it went “AAAAAH I HAVE TO GO AWAY!”. It’s cool that I’m a ghost horrifier. Are you a ghost horrifier?

Am: I must be, I haven’t seen one.
Au: Whoa. I just proved one of my goals to myself, which is cool, right?

Am: What’s that?
Au: Cutting up pancakes into a big tower. It’s pretty good, right? And there you have it: delicious hand made pancakes and this one you can make by hand.

Am: That sounds like an ad.
Au: It’s not. Just poke them finely with a fork.

Am: And then?
Au: Serve them on a plate and put maple syrup on them. Or not. But in my home I always sizzle the pancakes in maple syrup. Makes it tender.

Am: You sound like a cooking show. Perhaps you want to be a chef rather than be in a band.
Au: I’m going to be a chef IN a band. My cooking shows are only going to be on once a week.

Am: What will your show be called?
Au: But it is how to make breakfastses and it will be called Aurora’s Home-Made Breakfasteses.

Am: What would you cook for the creature?
Au: Maybe Seaweed Special. It’s made out of SEA and WEED. Then I tenderise the sea weed in sea water and then TA-DAAA seaweed special. But it’s not the one people eat. It’s the one that comes from the sea.

Am: But people eat seaweed that comes from the sea.
Au: The other that people don’t eat. It’s the one that gets in your way.

Am: That seems normal. Did you know there are deer in Phoenix Park?
Au: So? There are dead bodies in the desert, you know.

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